Friday, December 30, 2011

new year

All in all, 2011 was a pretty great year. It didn't always feel like it in the moment, but the events of the year add up to a lot, and that's worth noting. Instead of reflecting on last year, I'm looking forward! Setting my intentions for 2012 and putting my mind on what is to come rather than what has passed

1. In 2012, I plan to respect my body more, and in so doing, I hope to take better care of it than I do now. This will certainly be a challenge, but it's an intention I'm setting and I'll do the best I can to carry it out. I do not plan to diet or stick to some regiment, but I will do what has always worked for me in the past: to honor what my body actually asks for in terms of food, exercise, love, and care.

2. In 2012, I hope to stop spending time worrying about all the bad things that might happen to me, to my DH, and to the kids (and the house, and the car, and my job...you get the picture). Worrying does not keep bad things from happening, but it steals my ability to feel joy when good things are happening.

3. In 2012, I would like to work on my relationship with DH. This probably deserves a post of its own at some point...we're still relatively strong, but the day to day business of taking care of young kids has made our connection less personal somehow. I'd like to get that back. And sex? Man, I'm missing it, which should tell you how impersonal our connection feels at the moment.

4. In 2012, I'd like to do some writing. I'm not a very good writer, really, and I'd like to become better. I'd like to find a more authentic writing voice, if such a thing exists. I've become such an academic writer, a precise and careful writer, that there's no risk to the process anymore. There's no joy in it. And there's no spontaneity. See those last few sentences? That structure is one of my most common (three sentences, the third one starting with "And"). I'd like to stop writing in structures. They're unconscious at this point, but they're holding me back. Free-verse, I say! Unexpected sentence format!

5. Last but not least, I plan to pay attention to the moment. This is an intention I set every year and I figure by continuing to set it, I will continue to improve on doing so. I don't aim for perfection, but I'd like to be present for my life even more than I am now (which is not very much at all, lately).

Do you make intentions or resolutions for the new year? Do they matter to you?

2 comments:

  1. I am not much of a resolution-maker but I love the the New Year gives us a reason to pause and consider our intentions moving forward. I feel exactly the same way that you do about living in the moment and paying attention to the little things.

    Happy New Year!!

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  2. Happy New Year! My long comment just disappeared so I'll keep it short. Again we are on the same wavelength; I'm writing posts about my intentions for the year and #1, #3, and #5 are similar. Your words on marriage are EXACTLY how I feel, though I'm not sure how to get that personal connection back. Definitely do write a post about it!

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